


Once Upon a Time...

by jujitsuelf



Category: The Losers (2010), The Losers (Comic), The Losers - All Media Types
Genre: Unicorn AU?, complete and utter crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-04
Updated: 2013-09-04
Packaged: 2017-12-25 15:25:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 912
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/954717
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jujitsuelf/pseuds/jujitsuelf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>...in the Enchanted Forest, a unicorn named Jake went for a stroll...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Once Upon a Time...

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer – All publicly recognizable characters, settings etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended
> 
> ****
> 
> I don't even know where to begin with this one. I've read so many fantastic crack fics in the SGA fandom, it seemed the Losers were sadly lacking in such insanity. Here is my attempt to rectify that imbalance.
> 
> ****
> 
> No unicorns were harmed in the making of this fic

The Enchanted Forest glowed with the light of a million fireflies. A creamy full moon hung low overhead and every tree seemed to be alive with creatures enjoying the warm night air.

Jake tossed his head as he stepped carefully through the fallen leaves. His hooves shone pure white in the moonlight. He shouldn’t have been as fascinated by them as he was, but they were just so _pretty_.

Branches trailed over his back and down his milky flanks, their leaves gentle fingers, rubbing away the hurt which throbbed in his heart. He hadn’t meant to step on his troop commander’s hooves, he really hadn’t. Their legs had just gotten a little tangled during a particularly complicated maneuver. Why the guy thought they needed to practice defensive tactics still baffled Jake. They were in the Enchanted Forest for goodness’ sake. Who was going to invade?

The moonlight gleamed off his horn, he almost went cross-eyed looking at it then remembered what his mother had told him. ‘A good unicorn never admires his own horn. That’s conceited. Save admiration for other people. It’ll make you more friends.’

Jake sighed. He didn’t have many friends among the other unicorns. They all seemed to think he was a bit of a joke and something of a liability. But out here in the forest, he had lots of friends.

As he wandered further into the trees, rabbits hopped alongside him, birds twittered as he passed and countless other animals scurried closer to catch a glimpse of his star-white coat.

“You’re out late tonight,” Clay, the wise owl commented as Jake walked beneath his tree. “You have a date?”

Jake snorted and tossed his head again, making his mane fly in all directions. “Even if I did, I wouldn’t tell, would I? Soul of discretion, that’s me.”

Clay hooted derisively and took off, doubtless going hunting before the moon waned.

Plunging further into the depths of the forest, Jake wondered why more unicorns didn’t make the effort to go there. It was _incredible_. The closer he got to the central clearing, the more magic thrummed through the ground. The trees became gilded beings, more alive than any of those which grew near the unicorn camp. Each leaf glittered with golden magic, lovingly painted by tiny fairy hands. The animals were less shy, they stared up at Jake with fearless, ancient eyes. The moon seemed closer, grander, more serene. The stars glittered warmly, their glow friendly rather than icy.

Jake loved it there. But he didn’t go just for the magic. Oh no. He had a far better reason.

As always, when he made it through the tightly wound undergrowth and burst into the main clearing, Jake’s breath caught in his throat. Carlos was waiting for him. Carlos, with his gleaming coat, black as soot and twice as dark. His mane fell almost to his knee, longer than Jake’s. The moonlight stroked it with loving fingers, picking out hairs here and there to coat in dim, beautiful light. The horn on his proud forehead was black too, glittering and hard and deliciously different to all others Jake had seen.

Carlos’ flanks quivered as he saw Jake but as always, he didn’t move or speak. He always left it to Jake to break the silence. Jake was fine with that.

“Hello,” he called softly. Talking loudly in this most magical of spots always seemed like a crime.

Carlos nodded and bent his head to sniff at the lush grass beneath his sparkling hooves.

“How are you doing?” Jake asked, doing the same.

“Fine.”

Carlos didn’t talk much. Surprisingly Jake didn’t mind. He could fill the silence.

“Good day?”

“Went for a run.”

“Enjoy it?”

“Yeah.”

They ate some more, the grass tasted like every one of Jake’s favorite foods. He sighed blissfully. “I love this place.”

Carlos nodded.

“Got in trouble again today.”

“Color me surprised.”

“Stepped on Wade’s hooves and tripped him up.”

An indelicate snort made its way out of Carlos’ velvety nose. “Serves him right.”

“I don’t know why I bother with him,” Jake went on. “Nobody at home ever seems to like me.”

“So come live with me.”

Jake wasn’t sure he’d heard what he thought he’d heard. “Pardon?”

“Live. With. Me.” Carlos rolled his eyes. “You’re dumb sometimes.”

“Live with you? Out here?” Jake blinked rapidly, trying to encourage his brain to work. Carlos was something of an outcast, his black coat had stood out far too much among the silver unicorns. Finally, a few years back, he’d simply vanished. Few mourned his loss.

One day, when Jake was hopelessly lost in the forest, Carlos had found him and guided him back to camp. On that day, Jake fell irrevocably in love with him. Ever since, every chance he got, he sneaked out to meet the black-coated vagabond.

“You don’t have to,” Carlos muttered, turning away. “Just an idea.”

“Wait,” Jake called, trotting over to stand very close to him. “Sorry, you caught me off guard.” He very carefully extended his nose and touched it to Carlos’. “I think it’s a great idea. You’re a genius.”

Carlos leaned into him, the warmth from his hide making Jake feel suddenly feverish. “I have my moments.”

They stood there, white shoulder pressed to black, as the moon swam slowly across the sky. The stars faded, animals made for their burrows and the iridescence on the trees became less noticeable.

Jake sighed, he’d never been so happy.


End file.
